‘Dream of mirrors’ – My dad handed me this cassette that had some art work that I had never seen before , mad grafix and the song that really made the hair on the back of my head stand up….. the sound electric and so original , nothing I had ever experienced ever before in a very long time… it made me want to sing and to jump from the sofa or the bed and sing like that….. the band---- Iron Maiden….. and I was in love for the first time in my life….
I was 12 and I was listening to these bands whose members had long hair played guitars all their lives and lived in a world of sex drugs and rock n roll…… something that our society doesn’t necessarily support,…. Or should I say our society condones these acts of Satan worship ( or so it is termed) ….. but I didn’t heed that I wanted to be those guys on that stage making music…. And I wanted to see the crowd going wild beneath my feet…..
I was a teenager then and my parents thought it was just a passing phase but I am no longer a teenager and the obsession is still as fresh as ever before…. METAL… its not something u follow to fit into a crowd or to show you are cool… it’s a lifestyle and it is a form of mentality, a sort of ideals that you find defines you and defines you more than anything…. And yes I am proud to say I am a METALHEAD….
I was born in a society that has nothing to do with this , nothing relatively close to this but I belong to this world where I know I am different from other people and I like it like that…. I don’t refute it I don’t disagree I just know deep down inside everyone has their fears, hopes, anger, and every other emotion that drives me … and I also know that they don’t have a proper vent to let out all those things that they have trapped inside of them….
I was always searching for something heavy, something heavier than the last band I listened to, that search has led me to bands like metallica, lamb of god., sepulture, judas preist, megadeth, cannibal corpse, children of bodom, motley crue, testament, tool ,nile, dimmu borgir, hatebreed, motorhead, morbid angel,satrycon, napalm death and many others that I love to hear at anytime of the day… be it early morning or late at night….,.
My friends call me a freak and I don’t deny that… I am obsessed with death , blood and satan… I know that these bands project these images so as to make themselves look cool but some of the songs actually have some meaning and if you listen closely you just might find yourself connecting with any one of the songs by any of the bands….
I have been to a few concerts with some heavy heads in the metal scene both from India and from foreign countries…. And guess what I have head banged throughout… and I loved it…. I was in the crowd and the gods played in front of me and I loved every second of it…..
After a long fucked up day I come to my room and I don’t drink up, I don’t pick up a fight…. I just put on my favorite music and I head bang…. And I love it this way…
I guess why people segregate metal so much is that it glorifies what people try to hide…. It gives you a certain amount of power that you won’t get anywhere else… I know it as a fact that it is a sort of guiding power for me., a place where I truly belong and it gives me hope each day and I believe it is a form of religion to me…
I have been defending my love for metal since when I was 12 and if you dint get the awesome power when you listen to it, the overwhelming surge of power feeling that makes the hair on your neck stand up then you might never get it… but that’s ok cause judging by the thousands of metal fans that surround me in this erena…. We are doing just fine without you…….
nt that bad......cud hv been better.......but morning bliss is d best...
ReplyDeleteOkay, have to be honest. Couldn't relate to any part of it. This must an exclusive piece for the freaks...i mean...metalheads only. :P
ReplyDeleteAnd a very good friend tells me that listening to metal and relating to gothic culture doesn't mean that u are a satan-worshipper. Personally i find the concept idiotic and abysmal to the core. Nevertheless to everyone his own.
Writing is nice always. Good to know how u started of with this obsession in the first place. I guess what football/tennis is to me, metal/music is equivalent to that to you. Cheers!
metal aint all about death and gruesome tales maybe.....u have to know it to appreciate it...thats all i can say...nicely written tho...
ReplyDeletehmm... New way of looking at Metal. I remember one of my friends like you is a Death Metal fanatic, so one fine day I chose to listen one of the videos of Korn.Guess what? It was sickening. In this respect, I would also like to point out however, that I saw one of the videos of Korn on VH1 once- it dealt about devolution of mankind, the video was really nicely made and carried a social message.
ReplyDeleteNo, I don't get the surge of power when I listen to metal. Metal carries an awful sound of death, darkness and depression with no hope whatsoever and I refuse to live in a world that offers no hope for survival.
Nevertheless, we all are entitled to our respective view points and what might appear depressing to me can well appear to be a rush of power to you. I am glad you wrote this post. Always had some questions about Metal fans- like what is it they actually like about so dark a genre? You answered some of them but would have liked a little more explanation on the bit about "metal music providing power". Thank You. Hoping to see more of you.